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>  من بريدنا الإلكترونى, Tips
Hesham
المشاركة Jun 2 2005, 06:24 PM
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TIPS من بريدنا الإلكترونى

غالبيتنا لدينا أكثر من عنوان بريدى إلكترونى، وجميعنا نتسلم فى كل تلك العنواين، رسائل من كل نوع وبأكثر من لغة. ويكون مصدر هذه الرسائل فى معظم الأحوال، من أشخاص لا نعرفهم، حتى وإن وصلتنا من شخص نعرفه.

بعض هذه الرسائل تحتوى على نصائح ومواعظ دينية، وبعضها فيها نوع من التأمل حول الحياة وما فيها، وبعضها يحتوى على نكات ودعابات وألعاب مسلية، وبعضها يتضمن أخبار سياسية أو إجتماعية قلما تُعرض فى وسائل الإعلام العادية .. إلخ ..

وبما أننى واحد ممن يتسلمون يومياً عشرات الرسائل من هذا النوع لكثرة عناوينى البريدية cool.gif وعادةً أضطر لحذف تلك الرسائل لإفراغ صناديق بريدى، رغم أن بعضهم يكون ذو قيمة ما .. لذا، فقد فكرت فى الإحتفاظ بهم هنا فى المنتدى cool.gif

لأنى أرى فى كثير منهم "وليس كلهم" أشياء قد تهم بعضكم كما تهمنى. وسأختار لكم رسائل منتقاة منهم كل فترة، وأدعوكم جميعاً لفعل نفس الشئ، أى لإختيار ما تجدونه مناسباً وذو فائدة ما، وتضعونه لنا جميعاً هنا فى هذا الموضوع.

منها تفريغ لصناديق بريدكم، ومنها إفادة وتسلية لغيركم ..

كذلك، فكثير من تلك الرسائل، قد توحى للبعض منا بموضوعات جديدة لمناقشة مضمون نفس الرسالة، أو شئ مرتبط بها.

وأتوقع، أن إختلاف موضوعات الرسائل التى سنضعها بدون ترتيب، سيجعل قراءته شئ نافع وخفيف فى آن واحد.

فدعونا نفرغ ما لدينا، ونلهم بعضنا البعض، ونسلى بعضنا البعض بما يصلنا thumb.gif

تحياتى للجميع 2!!-_0.gif



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الله ثم الوطن

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Hesham
المشاركة Jun 2 2005, 06:25 PM
مشاركة #2


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Take a piece of paper and write down the answers...
The analysis is in the end...

Situation:

You are in a deep deep forest... as you walk on. You
saw an old hut standing there
(1) What is the status of the door?
(Opened/closed)

You enter the hut and see a table...
(2) What is the shape of the table?
(Round/Oval/Square/Rectangle/Triangle)

On top of the table there is a vase... in the vase
there is water.
(3) How much water is it filled up with?
(Full/Half/Empty)

(4) And what is the vase made of?
(Glass/porcelain/clay)(metal/plastic/wood)]

You walk out of the hut... as you carry on your walk
in the forest...you see a waterfall from far... there
is water running down...
(5) What is the speed of the water?

(Choose a number ranging from 0 to 10)

Some time after the waterfall... you step on something
hard on the ground... as you look down... you see
glistening gold in colour. You bend down and pick it
up... it is a keychain chained with keys...
(6) How many key/keys you see hanging on the keychain?
(Choose a number ranging from 1 to 10)

You walk on and on... trying to find your way out...
suddenly you see a castle.
(7) What is the condition of the castle?
(Old/new)

You enter the castle and saw a pool of murky water
with shining jewels floating on it...
(8) Will you pick up the jewel?
(YES/NO)

Next to the murky pool... there's another pool... with
clear water and money floating on it...
(9) Will you pick the money?
(YES/NO)

Walking to the end of the castle there is an exit...
you proceed to walk out of the castle. Outside the
exit, there is big garden; you see a box on the
ground.
(10) What is the size of the box?
(small/medium/big)

(11) What is the material of the box?
(cardboard/paper/wooden/metal)

There is a bridge in the garden some distance away
from the box,
(12) What is the bridge made of?
(metal/wooden/rattan)

Across the bridge, there is a horse.
(13) What is the colour of the horse?
(white/grey/brown/black)

(14) What is the horse doing?
(still and quiet/nibbling grass/running about)

OH NO!!! There is a tornado coming... some distance
from the horse.
You have 3 options:
(i) run and hide in the box?
(ii) run and hide under the bridge?
(iii) run to the horse, ride on and gallop away?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Here are the interpretations:

(1) The door:
OPENED DOOR - you are a person who is willing to
share
CLOSED DOOR - you are a person who is keeping things
to yourself

(2) The table:
ROUND/OVAL - any friends that came along, you will
accept and trust them completely
SQUARE/RECTANGLE - you are a bit more choosy on
friends and only hangout with those whom you think
are on the same frequency
TRIANGLE - you are really very very picky about
friends and there are not many friends in your life

(3) Water in vase:
EMPTY - your life is not fulfilled
HALF FILLED - what you want in your life is half
fulfilled
FULL - your life is completely fulfilled and good for
you! smile.gif

(4) Material of vase:
GLASS/CLAY/PORCELAIN - you are weak in your life and
tends to be fragile
METAL/PLASTIC/WOOD - you are strong in your life

(5) Flow of waterfall:
0 - no sex drive at all
1 to 4 - low sex drive
5 - average sex drive
6 to 9 - high sex drive
10 - gone case!!! super high sex drive!!! Can't live
without sex...

(6) Keys:
1 - you have one good friend in your life
2 to 5 - you have a few good friends in your life
6 to 10 - you have a lot good friends

(7) Castle:
OLD - shows that your last relationship is not a good
one and is not memorable to you.
NEW - your last relationship is good and it's still
fresh in your heart.

(8) The jewel from the murky pool water:
YES - when your partner is around you, you will flirt
around with others.
NO - when your partner is around, you will stick
around with him/her most of the time.

(9) The money from the clear water pool:
YES - even when your partner is not around you, you
will still flirt around with others.
NO - even when your partner is not around, you will
still think of her and will be loyal to her, not
flirting around with others.

(10) The size of the box:
SMALL - low ego
MEDIUM - average ego
BIG - high ego

(11) Material of the box (outlook of the box):
CARDBOARD/PAPER/WOODEN(NON-SHINING) - humble
personality
METAL - proud and stuck up personality

(12) The material of the bridge:
METAL BRIDGE - have very strong bond with your
friends
WOODEN BRIDGE - average bond with your friends
RATTAN BRIDGE - you are not in good terms with your
friends

(13) Colour of the horse:
WHITE - your partner is pure and good in your heart.
GREY/BROWN - your partner is only average in your
heart.
BLACK - your partner doesn't seem to be good in your
heart and appears to be bad sign.

(14) Horse action:
STILL AND QUIET/NIBBLING GRASS - your partner is a
very homely and humble person.
RUNNING ABOUT - your partner is a wild type person.

This is the last but most important part of the test.
From how I ended the story... a tornado approaches...
What are you going do? There are only 3 options:
(i) run and hide in the box?
(ii) run and hide under the bridge?
(iii) run to the horse, ride on and gallop away?

What will you choose?
Now, these things signify the above:
TORNADO - problems in your life
BOX - you
BRIDGE - your friends
HORSE - your partner

(i) So if you choose the box, you keep your problems
to yourself whenever you are met with problems.
(ii) Or if you choose the bridge, you will go to your
friends whenever you are met with problems.
(iii) Or lastly if you choose the horse, you seek
your partner whenever you are met with problems.

So if you think this is worth to take some time to
send it to your friends, then you are a friend indeed.

Or you think it is kind of true, you can also send it
to your friends cause you are true too



"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away


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الله ثم الوطن

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Hesham
المشاركة Jun 2 2005, 06:41 PM
مشاركة #3


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الهس بس هس .. الحلو لازم يحس
هو عمال بيتخن .. وأنا عمال بأخس

يا حبيبى المحشى استوى .. ابعتلى صباع فى الهوا

اتيكا انص انصنى .. حبك فى قلبى بيقرصنى
ان كنت فاكر دمى تقيل .. ادينى حقى وخلصنى

يا زانئنى وجنبك فاضى .. ازنؤنى كمان وأنا راضى

يا مشمت دول ودول .. يا مفرح العزول
إيدتك ألف رنة .. ادينى ميسد كوول

يا حبيبى فى هواك دمسنى .. وبضهر الشوكة إفعصنى

موتور ألبى اللى هاويكى .. عطلان وإنتى الميكانيكى

عمال بتدوسلى نو .. ولا راضى تقول ألو
ياللى حبك كنافة .. أنا بأحلم بالجاتوه

يأخى إرحم ألبى وحس .. وابعتلى إس إم إس
وإن كان مفيش رصيد .. لما أطلب دوسلى يس

ما تحن علينا يا بيه .. مديها طناش كده ليه
ما تخف علينا الكانسل .. وتكثر من الأوكى

يا مشمت كل الناس فيا .. اديتك بدل الكول ميه
ما تدوسشى ال نو بأساوه أرجوك .. وتدوس ال يس بحنيه

شكلك كده بتسك .. وتقول الشبكة تعك
وجيتلك أشوف النمرة .. ما لقيتهاش فى الفون بوك

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Hesham
المشاركة Jun 2 2005, 06:44 PM
مشاركة #4


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Lovely Rose at 87

The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn't already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder.

I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire being. She said, "Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I'm eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?"

I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!" and she gave me a giant squeeze.

"Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked. She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, and have a couple of kids..."

"No seriously," I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.

"I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!" she told me.

After class we walked to the student union building and shared a chocolate milkshake.

We became instant friends. Every day for the next three months we would leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized lis! tening to this "time machine" as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went.

She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up.

At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet.

I'll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped up to the podium. As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor.

Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, "I'm sorry I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know."

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, "We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing.

There are o! nly four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success. You have to laugh and find humor every day. You've got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die.

We have so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know it!

There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.

If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old. If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight.

Anybody can grow older. That doesn't take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change. Have no regrets.

The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets."

She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose."

She challenged each of us to study th! e lyrics and live them out in our daily lives.

At the year's end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago.

One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.

Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all you can possibly be.

When you finish reading this, please send this peaceful word of advice to your friends and family, they'll really enjoy it!

These words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.

REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL.
We make a Living by what we get, We make a Life by what we give.

God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage. If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.

Good friends are like stars.........You don't always see them, but you know they are always there





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Hesham
المشاركة Jun 2 2005, 06:48 PM
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2005 New Employee Rules & Regulations



Dress Code

It is advised that you come to work dressed accordingly to your
salary. If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise. If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore do not need a raise. If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and therefore do not need a raise.

Sick Days
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.


Personal Days
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturday and Sunday.

Toilet Use
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of the three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open and a picture will be taken.
After your second offense, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the "Chronic Offenders category". Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sectioned under the company's mental health policy!

Lunch Break
Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch as they need to eat more, so that they can look healthy. Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure. Fat people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a slim fast. Thank you for your loyalty to our company.

We are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions, comments,concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations,insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere.
The Management.

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Hesham
المشاركة Jun 2 2005, 06:51 PM
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Someone was searching the dictionary for the word 'Dictionary

He found this meaning

Dictionary is the thing you are holding, Stupid



Wondering what the definition of stupid was, he searched for the word stupid, he found





Is that you again
queque.gif angry.gif


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NOURA
المشاركة Jun 2 2005, 07:14 PM
مشاركة #7


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It is a good idea
i'll help ya out....wub.gif.....
........................................................


A guy phones up his Boss, but gets the bosses' wife instead.



"I'm afraid he died last week." she explains.



The next day the man calls again and asks for the boss.



"I told you" the wife replies, "he died last week."



The next day he calls again and once more asks to speak to his boss.



By this time the wife is getting upset and shouts, "I'VE ALREADY TOLD YOU TWICE, MY HUSBAND, YOUR BOSS, DIED LAST WEEK! WHY DO YOU KEEP CALLING?"



"Coz," he replied laughing, "I just love hearing it..."



biggrin.gif


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هزلت يا عرب
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Free My Land .....Free Palestine http://3emiyah.jeeran.com/hanzala.gif
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NOURA
المشاركة Jun 2 2005, 07:17 PM
مشاركة #8


A member mosh aktar
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البلد: Sweet Ottawa
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HUSBAND & WIFE:
...............................................

The wife is busy frying eggs when he husband comes home. he walks into the kitchen & immediately starts yelling:

"CAREFUL... CAREFUL... MORE OIL... TRUN THEM... TURN THEM NOW... WE NEED MORE OIL... THEY'RE GOING TO STICK... CAREFUL... CAREFUL... TURN THEM... TURN THEM... ARE YOU CRAZY... THE OIL IS GOING TO SPILL...USE MORE SALT... THE SALT..."

The wife is upset:

" What the hell is wrong with you??? why are you yelling like this??? do you think i don't know how to fry an egg???"

the husband calmly replies:
"this is to show you what it feels like when i'm driving & you sit next to me


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هزلت يا عرب
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Free My Land .....Free Palestine http://3emiyah.jeeran.com/hanzala.gif
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Hesham
المشاركة Jun 3 2005, 03:06 AM
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الحصان والمزارع (رؤية في فن تجاوز العقبات)

وقع حصان لأحد المزارعين في بئر مياه عميقة ولكنها جافة، وأخذ يجهش بالبكاء الشديد من الألم وأثر السقوط واستمر هكذا لعدة ساعات، وكان المزارع خلالها يفكر كيف سيستعيد الحصان ؟
ولم يستغرق الأمر طويلاً كي يُقنع نفسه بأن الحصان قد أصبح عجوزاً وأن تكلفة استخراجه تقترب من تكلفة شراء حصان آخر، هذا إلى جانب أن البئر جافة منذ زمن طويل وتحتاج إلى ردمها بأي شكل.
وهكذا، نادى المزارع جيرانه وطلب منهم مساعدته في ردم البئر كي يحل مشكلتين في آنٍ واحد؛ التخلص من البئر الجافة ودفن الحصان. وبدأ الجميع بالمعاول في جمع الأتربة والنفايات وإلقائها في البئر.
في بادئ الأمر، أدرك الحصان حقيقة ما يجري حيث أخذ في الصهيل بصوتٍ عالٍ يملؤه الألم وطلب النجدة.. وبعد قليل من الوقت اندهش الجميع لانقطاع صوت الحصان فجأة، وبعد قليل، نظر المزارع إلى داخل البئر وقد صعق لما رآه، فقد وجد الحصان مشغولاً بهز ظهره كلما سقطت عليه الأتربة فيرميها بدوره على الأرض ويرتفع هو بمقدار خطوة واحدة لأعلى!
وهكذا استمر الحال، الكل يلقي الأوساخ إلى داخل البئر فتقع على ظهر الحصان فيهز ظهره فتسقط على الأرض حيث يرتفع خطوة بخطوة إلى أعلى.
وبعد الفترة اللازمة لملء البئر، اقترب الحصان من سطح الأرض حيث قفز قفزة بسيطة وصل بها إلى سطح الأرض بسلام.. وبالمثل، تلقي الحياة بأوجاعها وأثقالها عليك، فلكي تكون حصيفًا، عليك بمثل ما فعل الحصان حتى تتغلب عليها، فكل مشكلة تقابلنا هي بمثابة عقبة وحجر عثرة في طريق حياتنا، فلا تقلق، لقد تعلمت تواً كيف تنجو من أعمق آبار المشاكل بأن تنفض هذه المشاكل عن ظهرك وترتفع بذلك خطوة واحدة لأعلى.
من عجائب الفيل انه يستطيع أن يرفع بخرطومه حمولة وزنها طن أو أكثر! ويلاحظ في ألعاب السيرك أن هذا المخلوق الضخم يقف بهدوء مربوطاً إلى جانب قطعة خشب بسيطة.. لو أراد لحطمها بكل سهولة!!
أتعرفون ما الذي يمنعه؟! كان هذا الفيل منذ صغره قبل أن يصبح قوياً، يربط بسلسلة موصولة بعمود حديدي ثابت يستحيل عليه التخلص منه، مهما حاول.. وفي مراحل نمو الفيل وكلما زادت قوته، فإنه لا يحاول كسر القيد مرة أخرى.. لِم ؟
الإجابة بكل بساطة لأنه يعتقد أنه ما زال مكبلاً بتلك السلال الثقيلة!!
كثير من بني البشر يتصرف مثل فيل السيرك !!فيبقي نفسه مقيداً وأسيراً في تفكيره... تقيده سلاسل الماضي وتربطه حبال مواقف مضت!
هو لا يحاول أبداً أن يتقدم إلى أبعد من الحدود التي وضعها لنفسه رسم لآماله وتطلعاته دائرة صغيرة لايجرؤ على تجاوزها !
تذكر: يستطيع الآخرون إعاقتك أو توقيفك عن تحقيق إنجازاتك مؤقتاً.. ولكنك أنت نفسك الوحيد الذي يستطيع إعاقة نفسه دائماً وباستمرار . لاتنس !
إن مهاراتك وقدراتك ومواهبك لن تكون ذات قيمة إلاّ إذا عرفتها.. ولن تكون ذات فائدة ما لم تستثمرها.



قاعدة ذهبية

حدَّد لنا الفاروق رضي الله عنه الخطوة الأولى في التطوير الإداري عندما قال: (رحم الله مَن أهدى إليَّ عيوبي). لقد أرسى الفاروق بذلك قاعدة ذهبية؛ حيث جعل اعتراف المسؤول الأول بالخطأ وقبول التوجيه من الآخرين نقطة الانطلاق الأولى في التطوير الإداري؛ حيث أدرك أن انحراف المسؤول الأول عن الخطة المرسومة هو انحراف للمسيرة برمَّتها. بل لم يكتفِ الخليفة عمر بن الخطاب بطلب تقويم أخطائه على رغم أنه المسؤول الأول في الدولة، لكنه أنزل تقديم الأخطاء والعيوب إليه منزلة الهدية، في إشارة واضحة جلية إلى علو الرغبة في هذا الأمر الذي يعدُّ نقطة الانطلاق الصائبة لتطوير إداري ناجح ومتميز، فقبول المدير بتوجيه النقد البنَّاء إليه من قِبل موظَّفيه هو مرحلة مهمة في طريق التطوير الإداري المنشود. ولكن المرحلة الأهم التي تدلُّ على قوة شخصية المدير ورغبته الحقيقية في تطوير العمل والأداء تطويراً نوعياً هي حث الأفراد الذين يعمل معهم على ضرورة لفت نظره إلى الأخطاء التي قد يقع فيها لإصلاحها، وتذكيره بعيوبه لعلاجها قبل فوات الأوان










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الله ثم الوطن

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Hesham
المشاركة Jun 3 2005, 03:10 AM
مشاركة #10


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هذا وصلنى بتاريخ 1/6/2005 عصراً .. أى بالأمس.

Kind all,

hi, 24 year old girl has got leukemia, blood group O-. Not
avaialable
at all. If you are of the same blood group, please call Dr.Ahmed
0124669265
. If not please forward.

Aldalo 3ala el 7'ayer kafa3eloh
Wa Jazakom allaho kola 7'ayer


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الله ثم الوطن

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